AMSTERDAM, The Netherlands - TODAY producer (and funnyman) Sean Reis spent three weeks in Amsterdam in preparation for “Where in the World is Matt Lauer?” In the following travel journal, Reis shares his sketches of a city of bikes and vice.
What’s in a name?
The correct name is the Netherlands. Holland only refers to the provinces that ring Amsterdam. The flag’s red, white and blue. The national color — and one you’ll see a lot of — is orange. Why? Because the House of Orange, led by fun kids like William of Orange, who got the country out from under Spanish rule. My favorite leader’s name is Willem the Silent. How’d they know what he thought?
The Red Light District
Now, SIMPLY BECAUSE THE RED LIGHT DISTRICT IS BEHIND MY HOTEL, I have to pass through it from time to time, to have dinner, go to the grocery store, that kind of thing. People talk about the girls in the windows, and I thought they’d be right on the canals. Not so. They are in the alleys, and because I haven’t made a study of it, I don’t know which alley is going to have girls in the windows and which isn’t. It’s rather like a pathetic lottery that you have to play, even if you don’t want to, to get from point A to point B.
The windows — they are doors actually — (AND NO, I DON’T HAVE ANY PRACTICAL EXPERIENCE WITH THAT, it’s just a simple elementary observation), are always bordered by dark, polished wood, with polished brass doorknobs. And the girls stand there, and tap on the glass, like YOU are the one in the pet store, to get your attention.
Not to be a high-minded American moralist, but I cannot help but look at them and think, “How’d you end up here? What was this situation better than?”
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On a final note, I want to extend my sincere appreciation to Caleb Newby and Michael Huckaby for their contributions to 411Mania and wish them each the best of luck on their new endeavors. You have both been extremely helpful where my development has been concerned and this place will not be the same without you. I’m not just saying this because you’re long in tooth, but you two are definitely the Abe Lincoln (Newbs for obvious height-related reasons) and Teddy Roosevelt - the forefathers - to this great Zone of ours. And, for any other 411Mania MMA Zone writers who also end up riding off into the sunset towards foreign pastures, I also hope the best for you and will continue to be a supporter no matter what. See you cage-side sometime down the road. Deal?
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OK, let’s get one thing cleared up before we start the recap of the show…
YES, Joanne did bungle and let the pre-taping cat out of the bag last week. She said “Sunday” (the day she and the ladies actually taped their performances), then quickly attempted to cover it with “I mean, Wednesday” (referring to the day the show was broadcast.)
YES, as confirmed by my behind-the-scenes AI contact, the performance shows at this point in the competition ARE pre-taped. Currently, the boys are singing for their supper on Saturday, the girls on Sunday. Do I think some transparency of this fact would have been appreciated by the general populus before Joanne’s tongue trippage?
Of course. But then, I’m a big fan of the truthiness.
I suppose it shouldn’t be surprising, given the current number of contestants and the extreme amount of work to be done between shows: Picking songs, rehearsals, Vommercials, hair, make-up, photo shoots, interview packages, schooling for the young ‘uns, you name it. Oh yeah, they try to sleep a little too.
Does it take a little of the excitement away from Tuesday and Wednesday nights right now? I think so. And according to all the emails I have received from AI fans asking if the pre-taping rumor is true, they do too.
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