pimblr.com

London, England - Refusing to acknowledge, much less apologize for her drug use, racist and homophobic comments, or even bothering to defend her offensive comments, citing artistic license, no, no, no, Amy Winehouse instead denies the incident ever occurred, even though her husband recorded it using his video camera.
"Amy Winehouse emphatically denies that, that is her making those offensive comments on that tape," said a spokesman for Winehouse. "She has no memory of the incident therefore it never happen."
However, as the video footage reveals, Amy Winehouse can clearly be seen and heard talking trash about a segment of her fan base: Blacks, Asians and Gays. All to the tune of that children's classic song, "Heads, Shoulders, Knees and Toes," while having sex and doing drugs with her husband in a crack den.
Meanwhile, Winehouse's mother came to her daughter's defense, claiming that she is to blame for the incident.
"It's all my fault," said Winehouse's mother. "When she was a little girl in rehab I'd cheer her up by changing the lyrics of popular children's songs to make them funny. It was all pretty harmless really. Like we'd change the lyrics to 'Puff the Magic Dragon' to 'Puff on the Magic then Drag on It' or 'Mary Had a Little Lamb' to 'Mary Had a Little Lamb'. Well, we didn't have to change the lyrics on that last one, just used suggestive voice inflections. But I assure you if you were offended by what she did with 'Heads, Shoulders, Knees and Toes' then you haven't been offended until you've heard Amy's version of 'Mary Had a Little Lamb,' even the clean and sober one."
Winehouse's mother went on to claim that her daughter also suffers from short term memory loss and that she has to remind Winehouse that she is a Grammy Award winner, among other things, on a daily bases.

thespoof.com

Palm Beach Post Staff Writer
If you plan on raising a glass of Guinness today in honor of St. Patrick, you’ll be in good company: About 13 million pints of Ireland’s most famous beer are expected to be enjoyed across the globe — 3.5 million in the United States alone — making March 17 the brand’s biggest day of the year.
But while you’re sipping on the creamy, dark stout, a debate’s brewing.
As Guinness grows in popularity — sales increased by 6 percent in the second half of last year, according to Diageo, its parent company — so do discussions involving everything from the correct temperature to serve it to the proper way to pour a pint. Some fans go so far as to insist on special glasses for the beer.
Then again, Guinness isn’t just a brew. It’s a way of life.
“It’s such a magic drink,” says Frank Gillespie, co-owner of McCarthy’s, an Irish pub and restaurant in Tequesta that has an advanced technological system for delivering its Guinness to the taps.
(As for those specialty glasses, with a curved lip, he keeps a few behind the bar just for himself.)
It’s hard to quibble with the Irish-born Gillespie, who’s poured plenty of Guinness over the years in pubs he’s managed from Dublin to Boston.
As he and other Guinness authorities are quick to note: When was the last time you heard anyone arguing over how to serve a Budweiser?
But that’s because few beers have as much history on their side as the 249-year-old Guinness.
Or as much innovation behind them.
Most beers get their effervescence from carbon dioxide alone, but Guinness uses a mix of carbon dioxide and nitrogen, which makes the bubbles more subtle. It also must be poured from a different type of tap, and it takes skill to pour it correctly.

palmbeachpost.com